Living together in an international marriage brings wonderful opportunities for both of you to share lifestyle traditions from both of your cultures. These traditions are important to share with one another because they are lifestyle traditions that you grew up with as a child which you carried on into adulthood.
There are some things that we do everyday that we never think twice about. For example, it is typically not the style in America to take off your shoes when entering the house. Shoes are worn outside as well as inside the house. Shoes are worn while sitting on the couch, and sometimes even while laying on top of the bed. This would never be accepted in a Japanese style home.
In Japan, it is second nature to remove your shoes when entering your house. Many Japanese homes have an area near the entry where you are to remove your shoes, and there is usually a place to store your shoes near the entry. For Japanese, harmony at home is important and that includes not bringing the soil or filth of the outside into the house on the bottom of your shoes. On a daily basis our shoes make contact with dirty streets, sidewalks, subways, public restrooms--you get the idea. It is easy to see why it makes sense to remove your shoes before entering your house. Is this a custom you want to take on when you marry your Japanese wife? I can tell you from my own experience that I initially thought it was silly to take my shoes off everytime I came home, but it is second nature to me now. I also believe that our house is cleaner and healthier for doing it.
Would you want to sleep on a futon or a mattress? In America, we have a number of mattress styles and sizes to choose from. We also have bed sets that range from lavish extravagant headboards and sizes to minimalist steel frames. In contrast futons, are simple and minimalist in nature, but don’t let that fool you, they are extremely comfortable. In Japan there is a practical element to using a futon because many Japanese homes are smaller than American homes therefore the futon is a space saver because it can be easily stored away during the day. If you choose to adopt a Japanese decoration theme in your home you may want to go the full futon route as well. In my own home, we opt to use a western style bed and mattress. You should choose the style that you and her prefer.
In terms of housing design or interior decorating style, the Japanese style is often simple, clean and minimalistic. Japanese aesthetics are very much influenced by Zen and basically the concept of “less is more” is the rule of thumb. The result is a less cluttered, more open, functional and practical space that is pulled together in such a way that promotes a feeling of calm and tranquility in the home. It is not necessary to do the entire house in a Japanese style. If your wife wants to add some Japanese style to your home it could be as simple as bringing in natural elements of bamboo, plants or a few natural hardwood furnishings.
Will you be comfortable eating with hashi (chopsticks) or will you only want forks, knives and spoons on your kitchen table? In my house, I grew up eating with traditional western silverware. My family ate with chopsticks only when we went out to a Chinese or Japanese restaurant. When I married my wife, I found that it was actually much easier to eat some Japanese foods with chopsticks than with silverware. Today in our home I’m proud to say we use both chopsticks and silverware with equal frequency.
So will you choose to adopt Japanese style or American style into your life together? My recommendation is to take from each style the things you like best and create a style that is unique to your relationship based on the best that both of your worlds have to offer.
In Japan, it is second nature to remove your shoes when entering your house. Many Japanese homes have an area near the entry where you are to remove your shoes, and there is usually a place to store your shoes near the entry. For Japanese, harmony at home is important and that includes not bringing the soil or filth of the outside into the house on the bottom of your shoes. On a daily basis our shoes make contact with dirty streets, sidewalks, subways, public restrooms--you get the idea. It is easy to see why it makes sense to remove your shoes before entering your house. Is this a custom you want to take on when you marry your Japanese wife? I can tell you from my own experience that I initially thought it was silly to take my shoes off everytime I came home, but it is second nature to me now. I also believe that our house is cleaner and healthier for doing it.
Would you want to sleep on a futon or a mattress? In America, we have a number of mattress styles and sizes to choose from. We also have bed sets that range from lavish extravagant headboards and sizes to minimalist steel frames. In contrast futons, are simple and minimalist in nature, but don’t let that fool you, they are extremely comfortable. In Japan there is a practical element to using a futon because many Japanese homes are smaller than American homes therefore the futon is a space saver because it can be easily stored away during the day. If you choose to adopt a Japanese decoration theme in your home you may want to go the full futon route as well. In my own home, we opt to use a western style bed and mattress. You should choose the style that you and her prefer.
In terms of housing design or interior decorating style, the Japanese style is often simple, clean and minimalistic. Japanese aesthetics are very much influenced by Zen and basically the concept of “less is more” is the rule of thumb. The result is a less cluttered, more open, functional and practical space that is pulled together in such a way that promotes a feeling of calm and tranquility in the home. It is not necessary to do the entire house in a Japanese style. If your wife wants to add some Japanese style to your home it could be as simple as bringing in natural elements of bamboo, plants or a few natural hardwood furnishings.
Will you be comfortable eating with hashi (chopsticks) or will you only want forks, knives and spoons on your kitchen table? In my house, I grew up eating with traditional western silverware. My family ate with chopsticks only when we went out to a Chinese or Japanese restaurant. When I married my wife, I found that it was actually much easier to eat some Japanese foods with chopsticks than with silverware. Today in our home I’m proud to say we use both chopsticks and silverware with equal frequency.
So will you choose to adopt Japanese style or American style into your life together? My recommendation is to take from each style the things you like best and create a style that is unique to your relationship based on the best that both of your worlds have to offer.
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