The tradition of the groom having a bachelor party prior to marriage has a long history in western culture. The first historical reference to bachelor parties is believed to be from the 5th century by the ancient Spartans who would celebrate a groom’s last night as a single man.
From then till now, celebrating a groom’s change in status from bachelor to husband is a common rite of passage for most American men. However, in Japan the tradition of a groom having a bachelor party is not common. You may need to explain what it is to your bride.
Not to worry though. Even if the tradition of a bachelor party is not common in Japan most japanese women will be aware of what a bachelor party is. With the international success of movies like “The Hangover”, there’s a good chance your bride will have some idea about what a bachelor party is all about.
Fortunately, our Japanese bride will most likely be very supportive of the idea of your having a bachelor party. In Japan, although the bachelor party tradition is uncommon, the view of male bonding over male activities and an attractive woman being present is very familiar in Japanese culture. It goes as far back to the Edo period with geisha culture, and to modern day hostess bars where “salary men” commonly unwind after a long day with their male co-workers before going home.
The best man is traditionally tasked with planning and organizing the bachelor party. Perhaps it will be him and you that will need to explain the tradition to your bride to be. What type of bachelor party will you be having? Today’s bachelor parties are far beyond the 1950s standard of some stag films, beers and a woman in a bikini jumping out of a cake.
The bachelor party usually includes your closest male friends and male relatives (bride’s male relatives included!). The standard bachelor party usually involves drinking, some gambling, cigar smoking, and a stripper. However, many bachelor parties have evolved to destination weekends that involve an activity like fishing, camping, hiking or a golf resort or casino weekend...you get the idea, basically, “guy stuff”. Just make sure it is guy stuff that you and your closest friends enjoy.
As mentioned earlier, your best man has the obligation to plan the bachelor party. Your best man also has the responsibility that the party doesn’t get too crazy and to look out for the groom. Your bride may be reassured to know this from your best man.
It should also be mentioned that your bride may want to have a “bachelorette party” as this is also becoming very common in the west. This tradition is not something done in Japan either, however her maid of honor, friends or perhaps one of your female relatives may want to give her one. Your bride may have no experience with this either so if this comes up it should be explained to her what a bachelorette party is all about too. If she decides to celebrate with her “girls” by all means let her have fun too.
The great thing about a bachelor party is it is an opportunity for you and your best male buddies to bond one last time before you tie the knot. Although the ancient Spartans may have celebrated the night before the wedding it’s probably advisable that you have the bachelor party a few days or a week before the actual wedding day. This way you will have time to recover from the celebration!
Bachelor parties are a time to celebrate you finding the love of your life, and for your “boys” to celebrate their friendship with you before you become a married man. Enjoy, have fun, and your bachelor party will be part of your fondest memories for years to come.
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